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June 30, 2003
Dancing Fool
UPDATE: OK, according to my parents, "Filipino cha-cha" aka "Disco cha-cha" is actually calypso! (as an enlightened 'Ohhhhhhhh' goes around the room) They also say that calypso, while fun, is regarded as cha-cha for those who don't know how to ballroom dance... DOH! I also really like cha-cha.. Latin dancing/music is fun!
...I love dancing, but I look like a fool doing it! Hehe. ;p
Still having a blast at ballroom dance class -- so far my favorites are swing (both coasts, baby!) and waltz. Polar opposites, no? Well, swing is just lots of upbeat fun and like Filipino cha-cha (OK, I lied... this is still my all-time fave..hehe), it's pretty easy to add/transition into lots of variations! Waltz is... beautiful. One time, I stayed after class to watch this couple from the advanced class practice the waltz... that was so beautiful and romantic -- how they moved so gracefully as one, staring into each other's eyes...
Perhaps in some respect, (ballroom) dancing helps fill an emotional void. It allows me to express myself without holding back... as opposed to a club/dance, where I often hold back because... well, I feel uncomfortable. I get too self-conscious of dancing too close, *gasp* actually touching the girl, or dancing a certain way... because...
*sigh* The things I miss most about a relationship are the companionship and intimacy/affection... yet, I find myself strangely comfortable with the way things are now... or maybe I'm subconsciously rationalizing to myself? =)
Back to dancing... some friends and I went to the Stern Grove festival this past Sunday to watch the Aloha Live - Hawaiian All Stars. I really enjoyed the Hawaiian music and watching the Na Lei Hulu I Ka Wekiu dancers perform! I think my obvious enjoyment prompted Jeanes and Rachel (two sexy Hawaiian dancers themselves!) to ask if I wanted to join their dance school!
Can you imagine?! ...But honestly, I am seriously considering it... I love the music, love the dances -- although I prefer the slower, more sensual Hawaiian style over the Tahitian style (which is fun and sexy in its own way)!
It's all about the hip action baby (and beautiful women people), right Jeanes? ;)
Speaking of beautiful women, my Lord there were a lot of them in the audience! I wonder if my big sis evil, the queen of Hawaii herself, was there? =)
Finally... for those following Road Rules South Pacific: isn't Donell such a major cornhole?! I can't stand jerks like that who deliberately push other people's buttons cruelly and unrelentlessly... it sucks that MTV only has a policy against physical abuse, because verbal abuse can be just as painful... and permanently scarring.
Posted by stevelee at 11:50 PM | Comments (6)
June 27, 2003
Tonnnnnnnnny Wan!
Even though Sung begged me to blog about him and our secret love affair (whoops! Sorry Mimi...=x), this entry's about Tony "21" Wan. =) Without getting overly sappy, it's been great knowing you all these years -- you've been a mentor, brother and friend... and I'm glad we've stayed in touch!
...Now, just work on those bowling/Magic/Warcraft skills so you'll actually give me a challenge next time! ;D
Posted by stevelee at 01:23 AM | Comments (2)
June 25, 2003
Yet more pictures! =)
A cornload of pics from FanimeCon!
Day 1:
Day 2:
Day 3:
Still want more? Well, check out my friend Jack's ninja movie! =p (Warning: 10mb file; please right click and save...)
And some of the reasons why I love jogging around Lake Merced:
Posted by stevelee at 09:59 PM | Comments (6)
June 24, 2003
Good Samaritan?
Hahaha Scott, you crack me up! Damn man, now you tell me that Toys R'Us is no good for getting my game on... no wonder I haven't met anyone yet! =/ (Although I have been getting lots of "asl?" type messages from random strangers recently... wtf?!)
==========
While driving towards an intersection with no stop sign for us, I saw this Asian woman who had a stop sign (and was perpendicular to us) slowly drive across the intersection. (Did that sentence make sense? =x)
Obviously, she was wrong... but clearly, she was in the intersection (and driving slowly too! wth?) and I expected the car in front of me to stop... what else could he do, ram her?!
...Guess what happened? =(
The whole scene seemed to happen in slow motion -- I don't know if that was caused by my disbelief that the car actually rammed hers, or because they were driving slowly (20-30ish?)? The car rammed into the middle of the woman's car, causing it to swerve right... before she recovered and pulled off.
The car in front of me stopped (in the middle of the intersection... dumbass), and out stepped 3 big white guys. Even though the lady probably was at fault, it still seemed that the car in front of me could easily have avoided/stopped from hitting her! ...Which made me suspect that they either weren't paying attention... or purposely rammed into her.
Since no other witnesses seemed to stop, I pulled off and just waited in my car to make sure no one was hurt... and that the 3 guys wouldn't try to do anything to the woman. After a while, I saw them start making phone calls... and since no one seemed hurt/threatened, or asking me to be a witness, I drove off...
Did I do the right thing? *sigh*
==========
"Do unto others, as you would have others do unto you."
A trite yet still meaningful adage that I try to live by. Which is part of why I hate rudeness or looking down on others. There was a $5 bill on the ground, one of our volunteers picked it up and asked if it belonged to anyone. When no one responded, he made some cheerful remarks and put it in his pocket.
At that point, another staffer (not on reg staff, thankfully!) sneered and made comments along the lines of: "Damn man, it's just 5 bucks... you must really need that money, huh? ...Hey, there's a penny over there, better pick that up too!"
WTF??? Damn, I was about to head over and wipe the sneer off that jerk's face permanently! Well, since the guy with the $5 seemed to laugh/smile it off (I wish I had that level of humility).. I just laughed along and remarked that it was his lucky day... I wish I had his luck! Something like that..
Posted by stevelee at 05:10 PM | Comments (2)
June 20, 2003
Inner Child
If the whole CS thing doesn't work out, and I decide not to go back into the biochem/life sciences field, I found something else I'd like to try: performing arts!
I just started thinking about the types of activities that make me happiest, and besides games, it's always been something related to the performing arts: singing, dancing, playing the cello, acting...
Of course, I run into the slight problem of sucking at the above-mentioned activities, so that might not work out too well for me! ;)
Sorry I've been MIA the past few days... been driving to Santa Clara for FanimeCon (to help out on registration staff AND take some pictures...sweet!) and back to San Francisco to hang out with some buddies whom were back in town. Which meant our nights consisted of playing Warhammer 40K/Settlers of Catan until 6AM! Ugh.
It felt... fulfilling to help out with reg staff. I can't fully explain why, but I just had a great time laughing, working, gawking...;) It's been 10 years(?!) since my last anime convention and damn, I don't remember nearly as many cos players! There were some damn impressive costumes!
...And no, I'm not just talking about the girls! O.o;
Do I have pictures? ...Do you even need to ask? ;)
Posted by stevelee at 02:01 AM | Comments (0)
June 18, 2003
Mmm...green stuff!
Melon cream soda. You can get it from the supermarkets in Japantown. For those of you who've tried it (and if you haven't, go try it!), what do you think? Yummy or disgusting?
...I'm still not sure if the aftertaste makes me sick or not...=x I bought it because it had a really cool green color!
Posted by stevelee at 02:35 PM | Comments (2)
June 17, 2003
Legacies...
I met with my pastor last week over lunch, and we had a good conversation about all sorts of topics: relationships, families, faith, etc. I already thought my pastor was a very nice, cool guy... but he amazed me with his ability to process my disjoint, rambling words (and boy, trust me, I was all over the place!) and understand the heart of my problem/point!
He really is a wise, compassionate, and insightful person. Moreover, he's just so full of love, and never made me feel... inferior? Maybe I'm going overboard with the praise, but that's really how I feel about him. Awesome guy.
At one point, he mentioned how left-handers tend to be more creative, and made excellent speakers. I gave a self-deprecating laugh and quipped: "That can't be true, look at me!"
He immediately responded: "I don't think that's true at all. You're a very good speaker! ...I think what's happening is you have so much information you want to express, that you speak before you're able to process all that information. ...I bet if you were to write your thoughts down, that would help you process it all..."
I was speechless. In that one exchange, he nailed that problem cold. There were other exchanges which moved me equally... but I think that can be summarized in this email he sent me:
In a sense, I think his words and actions set me free. I've long felt uncomfortable attending fellowships and sharing because there are things I've done (and continue to do) that I'm not proud of. Activities which don't seem "Christian-like." And I refuse to do something I don't believe in; I don't want to be a hypocrite... But I've never stopped believing... and I do feel this sincere desire to become more involved with the church.
Who knows, maybe they could use an old, rusty cellist in the worship team? =)
Tonight, I attended a beginning ballroom dance class with my mom; she knew the instructor for several years, and was able to get us in for free. And you know what? I had a blast!
Initially, I thought it would be weird going in with my mom or not having a partner, but within like 2 minutes, all those thoughts disappeared. All that mattered was learning and practicing dancing!
I was laughing and smiling with all my partners (which ranged from old to young, complete newbies to seasoned professionals, hot to not-so-hot), just having a great time... laughing at myself, reassuring partners who were having a harder time than I, and paying attention to advice from the pros...
I guess I really do enjoy dancing, just for the sake of dancing. =) I must have got that from my parents, who are excellent dancers (they have the trophies to prove it! ;))!
But what made my night (besides the glances from the cute ladies in the room ;)) was hearing from my mom afterwards: "The instructor told me that you have to come out and dance more -- she thinks you're a natural!"
Posted by stevelee at 09:29 PM | Comments (2)
More digital photography
Some friends and I are planning to take a road trip and hike various mountains and nature trails. What am I doing in preparation?
Why, researching all sorts of digital photography and editing techniques, duh! =)
Here are a few of the interesting links/books I've found for fellow novice enthusiasts:
Digital Photography FAQ
Photoshop Book for Digital Photographers (thanks Dave!)
Hopefully, I'll have some pretty pictures to show after my trip! ;)
Posted by stevelee at 02:18 AM | Comments (0)
June 16, 2003
More summer cleaning
I was going through my closet and drawers, putting aside old clothes to donate. Man, I can't believe I used to wear some of this tacky stuff! Neon blue/green colored t-shirts?? Ugh, what was I smoking? Hahaha...*cringe*
The coolest part had to be finding my old high school and APO t-shirts -- good memories! =D I think I'll wear them at the next APO events! They're cute in that dorky way...
Thank God I've already lost my self-dignity, otherwise I might feel embarrassed wearing them! ;)
I'm in a great mood... it's sunny, warm, and I'm dancing to my mp3s while cleaning! =D
Went up to Davis yesterday for Sam's graduation get-together... it just felt so nice being back up there, in that house, surrounded by friendly, familiar faces. I didn't really want to leave... there's this elusive feeling of "home" there that is hard to find elsewhere...
But congrats again Sam! Thanks for the yummy food, especially Will's kickass steak! *drool*
Sam wants me to cosplay (that's where you dress up like an anime character) for FanimeCon, but I have no idea what to go as? I'd love to go as Hajime Saitoh (he's such a cool badass!) from Rurouni Kenshin, but I can't pull that look off! =p
Aku. Soku. Zan! ("Sin Swift Slay," or "Kill Evil Instantly")
Woohoo, can't wait to play Warhammer 40K this weekend -- my Blood Angels shall punish the Chaos heretics! I have a new army list that I'm looking forward to testing out! (haha, I think that made sense to all of 1 person... hi Chris!)
Posted by stevelee at 05:06 PM | Comments (0)
June 14, 2003
Kristy's graduation
Nothing to add other than: Kristy and Tams looked hot as usual (while I did not =|); Hayward has some beautiful scenery; and that damn Justin Timberlake song, "Rock Your Body" is stuck in my head! Arghh!! =x
Posted by stevelee at 06:30 PM | Comments (0)
I've got major game baby!
...yeah, all sorts: Playstation, PC, Super Nintendo...
So I was at Walgreens tonight, buying some stuff for a graduation present. I then go line up to pay... I notice this cute girl to my right, checking out some magazines. She looks up and back at me, puts her magazine down and joins her friend who happens to be right in front of me.
They start chit-chatting, at which point I look away and kinda zone out. She glances back again, I look straight back at her and smile, and she then suddenly turns around and asks: "Do I know you from somewhere? You look familiar..."
I respond: "Hmm, probably not. I'd definitely remember someone as cute as you. =D Which school do you go to?" Etc., etc.
At which point we exchange numbers and make plans to call and hang out.
...OK, so everything was true up to and including the "Hmm, probably not" part. It didn't occur to me until after she left that my brain registered: "Oh hey, I think she was hitting on me! Doh."
Man, I'm so clueless sometimes... now you can see why I'm not into the bar/club scene! Haha. =p
Posted by stevelee at 12:20 AM | Comments (5)
June 12, 2003
That's what friends are for
"...May each of us remember that the best way to have friends is to be one, and the true test of a friend lies in our treatment of people from whom we can expect no favors in return..."
Most of you by now have already heard of FriendSTA (hi CZ!), if not already members of it. Leaving all the negative, tongue-in-cheek comments aside, it is cool how I'm getting in touch with old friends through Friendster!
But tonight, as I was browsing through friends' (and friends of friends) profiles and writing testimonials, I started thinking (haha yeah, uh oh indeed!)... thinking about the people I knew, and my place in their lives.
To many... no, most I suppose... I'm that kinda cool guy who's usually laughing and smiling. Definitely not a bad thing, but why do I feel like the afterthought -- the guy who's around, but not included? Does that mean I haven't made much of an impact in their lives? Do I convey a stand-offish or insincere personality -- or none at all? Am I not being a friend?
So many seem to have friends that glowingly recall some aspect of their lives... yet what will people remember about me? Who will be there when I die?
How does one measure friendship? Something arbitrary such as the number of times you call, IM, or hang out together? I've always thought of myself as a friendly, sincere guy who cares -- admittedly, lazy as hell -- but that seems to ring hollow in light of how empty I feel sometimes.
I guess the whole point of my contemplation is: am I a bad friend?
Perhaps part of the problem stems from me not focusing my attention on one particular group of friends. Perhaps I'm falling into the same "trap" that I did during my Davis years -- trying to befriend so many that I spread myself too thin and never get to know anyone?
Yet, I look at people like Ray and Gil, both of whom easily know 10x as many people -- and somehow manage to touch all their lives in some profound way. Why is that? What's wrong with me?
*sigh*
BTW, I'm not looking for, nor do I want, any pity. I'll be fine, I'm really not depressed (at least, not more so than usual! ;)), maybe just overthinking things as usual...
Posted by stevelee at 04:49 AM | Comments (5)
June 10, 2003
More insomnia
I swear that Eric must lead one of, if not the most interesting and exciting lives I know! I forget exactly how I found his website in the first place, but I constantly go back for his latest entries and stunning photos!
Although I've always enjoyed taking pictures, I blame have Eric to thank for fuelling my desire to learn more about (digital) photography! Also, with no small thanks to Leon, I've been daydreaming more and more about traveling the world and capturing it all on film! Well, digital "film," so to speak. We're not quite ready for Eric's shark tagging expeditions yet, but journeys to the beautiful scenic backroads of California are a nice starting point. =)
They sure look like they're having lots of fun, don't they? ;p
I plan to take a photography course (along with a vocal class) to improve my non-existent techniques -- the class requires students to bring in a camera with manual focus; would my digital camera be acceptable? Grr... State needs to offer a digital photography course like they do at Stanfurd. ;)
What else have I been up to?
Still sticking to the exercise routine. I really value the peace and solitude of jogging around Lake Merced -- it allows me to contemplate everything and nothing, like how full of pride I still am... and how I was such a punkass kid!
Haha, I remembered getting into fights all the time, even got suspended once for doing a piledriver on some other kid in PE class! =/ But there was this one fight with a guy who went on to become part of some gang. The thing I remembered most about that fight was how he punched me hard in the solar plexus -- knocked the wind out of me -- but I refused to acknowledge the pain, continued standing straight and forced myself to stare at him in the eyes with a cocky grin: is that all you got?
We never resolved that fight, as we were separated... but after that, we always greeted each other with respect and knowing smiles. In a sense, that's what all my fights and other troubles I got myself into were usually about: respect, and proving myself. I never instigated trouble, but neither did I back down from anyone or anything. Yes, I had a major inferiority complex. *sigh*
Ironically, it wasn't until I took martial arts (Hapkido) that I learned discipline. By the time I received my black belt, our school's creed stuck in my head: to never use our abilities to show off or for selfish reasons...
Sometimes I think I bend over too much for other people... to the point where I might seem a pushover. At those times, I wonder why I back down... but I guess having experienced the "other side," I just try to make peace and avoid unnecessary conflict.
Life's too short to spend it caught up in negative emotions, right?
Posted by stevelee at 04:35 AM | Comments (1)
June 08, 2003
Somewhere Out There
While chatting recently about what we missed most about relationships, my friend and I both agreed that it was the so-called "little things." The hugs, hand holding, watching her fall asleep in your arms... and waking up with her the next morning (or afternoon ;))...
Another thing I truly miss is the companionship. Sharing goofy laughs and dorky moments together. Knowing that regardless of the time, you could always call that person up to just talk or go out for random, spontaneous trips -- like drives along Highway 1 just because the night seemed particularly beautiful, or to get away.
There are so many times -- like when my family drives me crazy for the umpteenth time -- when I just want to call a friend to talk with or go out, and I scroll through my cel phone's phone book to find a "suitable victim." But almost inevitably, I don't call anyone because I'd feel bad/awkward inconveniencing them, or seeming a nuisance. I know everyone has their own problems and worries to deal with. At which point, I either go out on my own, or write angst-filled entries like this. =)
Mind you, this is not a call for pity at all. Heh. I believe in personal independence and handling my own problems... but once in a while, it'd be nice to have someone else's shoulder to lean on.
Ugh... this is such a sappy entry. I'll probably delete it later when I come to my senses. =) Haha, so much else to worry/stress about, and I'm writing about this? I'm silly. I have the urge (urge?!) to play sports, like a league or something... I think the extra physical activity, competition and adrenaline is what I need to clear my mind.
Final random note to self: playing Settlers of Catan until 7AM really screws up your sleeping habits! Darn you, Leon! =/
Posted by stevelee at 11:54 PM | Comments (4)
June 06, 2003
Need For Speed!
There were two recent races speed exhibitions that stood out:
First was against a Subaru WRX. It had a STi badge, but I'm guessing was just some ricey thing... he probably did the standard turbo upgrades though: chip, boost controller, bypass, etc. That car had some nice turbo-aided power! Probably due to my greater familiarity with Lake Merced, I was always able to enter the turns and apex at higher speeds and cleaner angles, but he was always able to accelerate out (higher exit speed) due to his manual transmission (allowing him to stay in his power band/RPM). If there were more straightaways, he'd definitely have dusted me; but in this situation, I was able to keep up. I gave the guy a thumbs up before we went our separate ways -- that was fun! =)
Second was against some sports bike. The rider was one of those cocky bastards who didn't think cars could hang with his bike -- he had on the full racing suit and revved in the lane next to me. When we took off the line, I think I caught him off guard, but he was easily able to catch up and pass me. But, I knew one thing apparently that rider didn't: sports bikes can't hang with sports cars in the twisties!
So while he braked pretty hard going into the first turn, I was able to blow by him... and from that point on, he never showed up in my mirrors again until after we passed the Lake Merced twisties. When he caught up again later, I noticed that he no longer acted so cocky, and just stayed behind my car. =)
Finally, these are some great times for performance enthusiasts in the US as by this time next year, we'll be seeing Subaru WRX STi's and the equally badass Mitsubishi Lancer Evo's on the streets and racetracks! *drool*
Hopefully, this will force car manufacturers who've monopolized the sports car market for so long (*cough BMW M3 cough*) to evolve and give us more value for the money. Otherwise, for just short of $30k, you can make my next car purchase a Lancer Evo!
...Now, just need to find space in my garage for the Corvette and RUF/Porsche 996 Turbo! =D
Posted by stevelee at 10:58 PM | Comments (9)
Finding... Ono's!
OK, despite all the hype and rave reviews, I'm happy to report that Finding Nemo sucked!
Pshaw! Dude, like whatever!
Hehe, no... Finding Nemo really was a totally righteous movie: very cute, funny and educational! Pixar did an outstanding job animating stunning images, especially considering that most of the movie was done underwater! Thanks to Dori (for whom Ellen DeGeneres did a outstanding and hilarious job voice-acting) I now know how to speak whale:
GoooOOOOoo SEEEeeeEEE thhhhiiSSSSSS MOOOOOOOvieeeee!
Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine!
Of course, the movie wouldn't have been even half as enjoyable without the wonderful company and conversation of the crazysexycool Carol! Sweetheart that she is, she even lei'd me! Whoa! Girl, you can "stalk" me anytime! Hehe. ;p
Just keep swimming... swimming swimming swimming... what do we do, we swim!
Today, I was blessed with the company of 2 more hot girls, Jeanes and Rachel (and Issac, our awesome driver), as we drove down Highway 1 for lunch at Ono's Hawaiian Grill -- located in Half Moon Bay, just 2.5 miles north of Highway 92.
The food was standard Hawaiian plate-lunch fare: I had the loco moco (of course), while my friends had yummier looking/sounding orders like the Kalbi Chicken and Ribs plate!
While the food wasn't particularly special, as Wahine told me: the drive alone is worth it. =) Unfortunately, the sun never quite peeked out, but we still enjoyed some nice views along Highway 1, and stopped at Pescadero Beach to walk around and check out the tidepools.
Posted by stevelee at 04:45 PM | Comments (4)
June 03, 2003
Are you ready for some pictures?
Finally had a chance to catch up and upload some pics from recent events:
Some pics from Ray and gang's visit to San Francisco for Bryan and Angela's wedding. It was very cool hanging out with you guys; we need to do it again! =) Here's Mark's picture compilation from the weekend.
I attended OZ's 5 year rechartering banquet the next night; I just wish I took more/better pictures. *sigh* Remind me to do a better scan of the old pics when I have the chance...
Finally, the PJJ pictures that I promised a while ago! Yes, I know how so many of you were dying to see me in my sexy PJs, so enjoy. ;) By the way, all of these pictures were provided by Kev Lowe from Gamma Beta, and only represent a fraction of all the pictures that he took! He is truly a camera stud! =)
I truly wish I could've made it to the Alumni BBQ, especially since I heard that both Ernie and Jon Yee (my pledge brothers) were there! Ahh well, there'll be next time, right Kim/Stef/Rowena/Andy? ;)
Posted by stevelee at 04:59 AM | Comments (7)
June 02, 2003
Spring Summer Cleaning
I spent all day cleaning my room (and it's still not done! argh), and while throwing/packing a bunch of stuff away, started thinking to myself: "Damn, I'm such a sentimental packrat! Why do I keep all this crap??"
At the very moment I completed that thought, I came across the folder-bag thingy given to me as a voting delegate at the 1996 APO Nationals. More importantly, I found old awards, cards, letters and notes that helped me remember why I kept all this stuff:
"Yup... Itz almost over. Who are we? Well I'm William Warriner's (Iota Phi pledge) brother... In LFS, Ray Alpha Delta Theta"
Ray's been following me ever since...;)
"... Boy this is weak -- no dancing delegates or anything. Hey! Party in my room 861 -- after regional mtg. -'G'"
That was the first time I ever drank... I think I had a vodka shot (and wine cooler?) with Gamma Gamma before staggering back to my room with a major buzz. Hahaha. Thanks Gil for keeping me entertained during those long, boring legislative sessions! =)
Further proof of the "evil" Gamma Gamma influence (on the just-rechartered Chi chapter):
"...but if you do come to ucla territory, promise you'll visit, ok? but i'll definitely see you at regionals in dec. i can't wait. we're going straight to the chapter that corrupted chi chapter. ahhh! ...Love, Sirintorn"
In light of my previous entry, this old letter really hit home:
"...I've known you for over a year and I have seen so much dedication and spirit in your heart. ...And I remember activation. The brothers of my class were contemplating whether or not to cross... But I decided to do it... And what motivated me were people like Mimi, Chris T., and you. Yes Steve, you helped me realize what dedication and service was really about. I wanted to be as involved and enthusiastic about service as you. ...I realized that we all forget to thank people who have always been there. You have always been there.. for me and APO. So I want to appreciate you. I think you're the greatest... Love, Shirley (always, your lil bro^3)"
Posted by stevelee at 11:05 PM | Comments (4)